Tonga: Weddings and funerals

Responsibilities for weddings are divided up between the bride’s and groom’s families. In each family, the men take care of the food and the women take care of dowries and gifts. When family members meet together, they ceremoniously exchange gifts, which will be used for the wedding celebration. Women bring the tapas and mats, while the men reciprocate with pigs, yams and other food. The dowries are worn as a costume, or type of dress. The wedding couple is paraded around the village in a very festive celebration.

Every bride dances for her husband and his family. As she performs, her husband joins in the dance. Her brothers also join in, but the husband is forefront. While the bride’s movements are polished and gentle, her husband’s movements are boisterous and rough, in order to highlight his wife’s grace and beauty.

Tongan funerals are also times of great respect and love. The type of mat/ta’ovala worn indicates how one is related to the deceased. Family members might choose to wear worn or frayed mats to show respect and love for the deceased. Someone wearing a colorful finely woven mat to a funeral suggests they have high status. The highest status goes to the father’s oldest sisters’ children, called the Fahu. A younger brother would wear the dirtiest, worn-out mat.

Feel free to ask our villagers to explain their traditional clothing and the meaning of their intricate patterns and accessories.